Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Our mind works in a funny way. Have you ever had the experience of having something at the back of your mind stirred up all of a sudden?... and then you start to think back and reflect on your life and all the things you've done? Yea i just went thru this little emo phase. For no particular reason at all. It just happened like that. -.-" Feeling sort of angsty and raw now. And my heart feels so heavy its like gonna drop anytime soon.
I was just thinking of my achievements so far/ anything i can be proud of. And i felt a little useless. Not because i'm a failure or whatsoever, but because I know that i'm capable of so much more. i've seen that side of me before, a long long time ago. But now, i'm not utilising myself properly. I procrastinate too much, i'm indecisive, sometimes i take things too lightly and i don't voice my opinions much (unless its with ppl i know moderately well), i'm blur to a fault.... and the list goes on.
I know u ppl (am i right jas? LOL.)always say it's great that i'm always happy-go-lucky, always smiling, never worrying blah blah blah.... but sometimes i really wonder if its a good thing. Sometimes you need to fret over stuff in order to take them seriously and to do well. Not always trying to look on the bright side and laugh it off, thinking that it isn't that bad after all. I should strive for perfection in the things that i do (or at least try to).
Emo.... =(
Hmmm. but on second thought, being optimistic and happy isn't that bad. You get to enjoy your life more. *shrugs*
Oh wells i just gotta sleep it off i guess, And knowing me, I think i'll wake up a happy girl again tmr. Dunno if i should be glad about it. Sigh. God, pls motivate me. Thank you.
I promised dear dear to sleep early budden this stupid emo thing suddenly occurred and i couldn't sleep. Just had to let off some steam. Hehe. But now only 11 huh baby. dun kill me. i'm going to zzz for real now =)
3:04 PM
